question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
