Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I am spending my child support on dildos
home. puking in laundry basket.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Randomize
