we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
