My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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