Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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