I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
i believe in u and ur pee
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize
