K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
