spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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