im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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