know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
