My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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