It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
