Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
