You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
