At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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