sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
