the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
