walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
