Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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