ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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