now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
