Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
