I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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