Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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