that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
splinters make it hard to masturbate
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize