Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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