I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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