i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
