I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
