It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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