yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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