Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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