I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
