They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
All the doctor said was why
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