My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
