no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
