your thong is hanging out like whoa
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
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The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
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Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
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