You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
