I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Randomize
