She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
