whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize