i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
be right there i have to get my cape
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
