so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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