You're so nebulous sometimes
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
