That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
