i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
