we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
