One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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