I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
