if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Randomize
