susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
